Have you ever said something that you should not say and hurt your friend’s, significant of others or even families’ feeling and later on regretted what you said to them? I think we all had this kind of experiences. Yesterday, I went to the personal empowerment session. One of the things that speaker was teaching is how to control our emotion so that we are not going to spontaneously say the things to others.
First, why this is so important? In business setting, out of control emotion can kill your business (Relationship with business partners, business deals, relationship with clients etc). Keeping your emotion under control is crucial.
In yesterday’s session, my good friend and professional business coach, Danie taught exactly how to control your emotion when you feel very frustrated by using method called “AHA” method.
She shared most people get frustrated because they think external forces make them in that situation. It is also called “Victim mindset”. Let me explain what that means with simple example.
Wife and husband, she is washing dishes in the kitchen and husband is sitting down in the sofa and watching TV. Wife started to feel like why she is the only person washing dishes and he does not do anything. She started to get frustrated.
If this keeps going, what’s going to happen? It potentially leads to argument or fight because she might not be able to control her accumulated frustration that he is not doing anything for her (Victim mindset).
Then Danie explained to us about AHA method to control this situation. This is what AHA means.
A = Awareness
H = Halt
A = Action
A = Awareness
When you frustrated, it is crucial that you become aware of the feeling “being frustrated”. This is most difficult part. We all feel frustrated but we typically don’t calm ourselves and recognize our frustration. This method will make you more attentive when you become frustrated.
H = Halt
Once you recognize your frustration, you can stop feeling that way and start to seek options to resolve this. In the example above, options can be
Option 1: She can call her husband for help (Ask him wash the dishes with her)
Option 2: She recognize that her husband had long day and understand his situation and let him be
Option 3: Yell at him
She may still yell at him. However, at least, she has more options for her to choose. Potentially, there are more options but you know what I mean. At least, there is many more options than you think it existed.
A = Action
This is very simple. Pick the option that you think the best and take action.
By using AHA method, you will have total control over your feeling and emotion as most people can’t even control their emotion when they get frustrated. You feel much more empowered if you can control your feeling rather than your feeling and emotion control you.
I hope you got great value out of this blog post. If you want to hear what my friend, Danie is teaching or interested in getting coaching from her, you might want to check out her website at www.beamezing.com or simply clicking here.
P.S 1: I was delighted that I was interviewed by Li Lin, business coach at Immigrant CEO as well as owner of The Successful Immigrant! I shared my journey toward financial independence during this interview. You can listen to interview soon on the Immigrant CEO podcast.
P.S 2: Best way to communicate with me is through Facebook, you can join my Facebook fan page. I sometimes discuss the topic that I don’t mention in the blog site. If you want to join the community, click here.
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